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Fleuferflumpkins and Shoe Laces

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so-humorous:

beep beep beep beep

beep beep beep beep

(Source: lolgifs.net, via onlythesassiest)

pussyhands:

what if our use of emojis gradually becomes so extensive that we actually circle back to writing in hieroglyphics

(via onlythesassiest)

vuls:

prepare for high school then prepare for college then prepare for your career then prepare for retirement then you’re dead 

(via onlythesassiest)

buckbarrow:

do you ever have second-hand obsessions

like one of your friends is super obsessed with a thing so whenever you see something about it you’re like “YES THIS THING” but you’re not the one obsessed with it. they are. you know very little about this thing and yet it still excites you because it excites your friend

(via belongstothedreamers)

gaydirectioner:

IF YOU ARE A GIRL AND YOU HAVE NOT HEARD THIS SONG, THEN EDUCATE YOURSELF AND LISTEN TO THIS SONG AND STAND UP TOGETHER LADIES.

(via onlythesassiest)

Basics 

Name: harry styles
Age: harry styles
Genderharry styles

Favorites

Food: harry styles
Drinkharry styles
Book: harry styles
Favorite Author: harry styles
Song: harry styles
Movie: harry styles
TV Show: harry styles

Life

Dream Job: harry styles
Tattoos:  harry styles
Piercings: harry styles

Tumblr

Reason Behind URL:  harry styles
Reason Behind Icon:  harry styles

(Source: jimmyhoward, via onlythesassiest)

(Source: fauxpasdreams, via oliviacara)

toocooltobehipster:

this is so interesting

(Source: maptitude1, via onlythesassiest)

pricklybangbang:

today at work i asked a customer if he wanted french vanilla creamer with his coffee and he said no because he wanted the “heterosexual” creamer instead and it just blows my mind that straight people say shit about how queer people “force our sexuality on them” because i have never met a single queer person who has done something like assign a sexuality to coffee creamer

(Source: supremecute, via onlythesassiest)

"what do you mean you don’t know your wifi password?"

- me to someone who doesn’t know their wifi password (via zackisontumblr)

(via onlythesassiest)

frequentlynotonboats:

demi-naynay-gomez:

221bitssmallerontheoutside:

tazzygal:

orihime-strawberry-love:

superduperfitblr:

kendrawcandraw:

Stop sexualizing my body stop shaming my body stop policing my body

BREASTS ARE SEXUAL ORGANS

BREASTS ARE SEXUAL ORGANS

BREAST ARE SEXUAL ORGANS

BREASTS ARE FUCKING SEXUAL ORGANS!!

WE DONT LET MEN WALK AROUND WITH THEIR DICKS OUT BECAUSE ITS A SEXUAL ORGAN!!

GET THE FUCK OVER IT YOUR FEMALE BREASTS ARE

  • SEXUAL
  • FUCKING
  • ORGANS!!!

source: X

Ahem.

BREASTS ARE NOT SEXUAL ORGANS YOU INCONSIDERATE DICK!

Breasts are mammary organs, meaning their true and primary purpose is to nurse babies.

I’ll repeat that for the slow people in the class, you warthog-faced buffoon.

Breasts are mammary sacks. They are meant to feed babies, just like a cow’s udder. They aren’t sexual organs. They aren’t classified as such in biology texts (certainly none of the ones I checked out to answer this post)

Men have breasts, you pile of refuse. Their breasts are smaller than women’s, but they possess the same mammary glands and, properly stimulated, can produce milk. Men can get breast cancer. They can develop larger breasts due to excessive hormones. Their breasts are exactly like a women’s breast, except that since their testicles produce testosterone in high degree, they don’t have enough female hormones in their bodies to start lactating.

So, you pile of putrescence, you’re probably thinking, “If breasts aren’t sex organs then how come guys get horny looking at them and women get turned on by playing worth them, huh?”

The answers to both are so terribly simple that you might just be able to follow them if you pay attention, pig.

Men are enticed by breasts because they’re not allowed to see them. Women are sensitive because stimulation triggers two responses - bonding hormones and lactation.

In case you’re too simple to get this, I’ll break it down further for you. In cultures where breasts are viewed daily, they don’t do much to get a guy hot and bothered. There are hundreds of paintings from the renaissance period and earlier depicting women nursing babies, especially images of the Blessed Virgin nursing Christ, and none of these have ever been considered provocative, because that’s what boobs are for. Meanwhile, in cultures where everyone from baby sister to great-great grandma walk around topless because the weather will kill them otherwise, dudes don’t get raging erections every time they see a breast. They don’t find boobs enticing the way men do in America, where boobs are considered shameful and need to be hidden.

As for women getting aroused by their boobs being played with, you brainless donkey, a woman’s body responds to get nipples bring touched by flooding her body with bonding hormones that help her attach to get babies - you know, the people her breasts are actually supposed to be used by - and hormones that get her glands making milk. Also, please note that many women with large breasts don’t feel any stimulation when fondled, meaning they aren’t sensitive enough to get off on having their boobs played with.

Do me a favor and GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELF YOU PURITANICAL ASS! My breasts are NOT SEXUAL ORGANS. They are lactation organs designed for my use and my baby’s use. Not for any man’s use or pleasure.

You inconsiderate space herpe.

Not only is it educational as fuck but the insults are hilarious as all get out! 

this will forever be my favourite AND the single most important thing on this website.

And to the “but women get aroused when they have their breasts touched” point. 1) Any part of your body that isn’t touched frequently is going to be more sensitive. 2) So do men. 3) Some people get aroused when they have their feet touched and yet somehow it’s not socially taboo to wear sandals.

(via onlythesassiest)